The trouble with a bad habit is that it’s so engrained in our minds to think/speak/behave a certain way that it has become mindless. As automatic as brushing your teeth in the morning or putting on your underwear before your jeans (I have that one down for the most part….). We train ourselves every single day through the power of repetition to do things a certain way…be it technique in our downward facing dogs, to what we say to ourselves when we look in the mirror.
And therein lies the rub – so the saying goes, what you think, so you become.
“I am not enough” repeated in different ways to yourself throughout the day – not enough energy, not enough money, not pretty enough, not smart enough, strong enough, tall enough, short enough – sends home a clear message that will leave you feeling STUCK and with a nagging feeling of discontent.
By repeating this kind of thought pattern to yourself, in all areas of our lives we start to feel the ripple effects of negativity. We say no to things because we aren’t worthy. And so the cycle goes on and on and on.
To break an old habit, you need to override it with a new one. And you need to lather-rinse-repeat until you’ve done it so many times it starts to happen naturally. It needs to be uncompromisingly so, because as soon as we allow an excuse to dictate our actions and we revert to old ways it’s like starting from scratch.
This has become so glaringly obvious to me of late. I’ve been trying to improve a few yoga postures that for a long time have been intimidating so I’ve just ignored them. After making the decision that to get stronger I must push myself to go to the places that are uncomfortable, I started to practise handstands more often. Genuinely I cannot tell you how many times I have fallen. But the more times I’ve gone down, the less scary it’s become, and I can feel myself over-riding that thought pattern that has forever held me back from standing on my hands. In the grand scheme of things this is a minor victory I’ll admit. But the small win will snowball into other areas of my life because the ability to overcome a fear is completely a transferable skill. And every time I show up to practise, even when I don’t want to, it’s another victory and another time I’ve overridden my nagging brain that says “I’m not good enough”.
Show up for yourself. Whatever your micro or macro goal might be, say YES to it. Saying YES to your goals, especially when it’s hard is sending a crystal clear message to yourself and to the universe that you are prepared to work for it…and therefore are prepared for whatever the “it” might be.
But it doesn’t require extravagant action…perhaps you are feeling a little stuck and haven’t quite figured out why yet, so here are some tips to encourage a more positive outlook that will hopefully snowball into other areas of your life to help light you up again…
– be clear with what your goal or goals are; writing them down and having them somewhere visible will help keep you focused
– every morning before you get out of bed, repeat to yourself your intention – your reason behind your goal. Goals can be superficial and are a moving goalpost, your intention is what will keep you hungry and aware of the bigger picture
– every evening before you go to sleep, revisit what happened that day that you are grateful for, revisit your wins from the day, and consider what could have gone better and how (not to berate yourself, instead to better understand where you can improve)
– learn to make yourself a priority so that working towards your goals will not be compromised…sometimes we need to be fluid with plans, yes, but no one is going to be able to put the work in for you
– even just a few minutes of meditation can alter your outlook and assist in compartmentalising your thoughts
If you feel in need of something drastic to pull you out of a funk, there’s good news. I’ve some very special Spanish retreats coming up and I’d love for you to join us! Visit my website www.myhappybody.co.uk for more information